This is how I do a lot of my backgrounds - just scribble away in circles, and the results can be really interesting.
Sunday, 29 March 2015
Saturday, 21 March 2015
I was DEFINITELY talking to myself here! It's often said that this is the first sign of madness, but does it count if you're writing it down rather than muttering in the corner??
It started really simply - 3 or so colours of paint just slapped down any old how. Backgrounds don't have to be clever or complicated! After all you're going to write and collage on top.
You can tell exactly what I was thinking from the very first things I wrote down. ... I have this thing going on in my head that I'm not a worthwhile person unless I produce something every day - its kind of justification for my existence, because otherwise I often feel like a taker rather than a giver.
Sunday, 15 March 2015
This page is an exploration of pain really - someone who used to be a very close friend and very special to me doesn't really seem to have time for me any more. I know its hard that she has to come to me because I can't drive now, and getting on the bus is too much for me, but I thought there were still lots of way for us to connect. It seems I may have been wrong, at least for her, and this was me working out my feelings of sadness and some anger about a friendship that seems to be ending because I can't do things any more.
The vivid colours I chose may have had more to do with anger and disappointment,than anything else, but are also to do with strongly asserting that I am still ME, and I thought I was valued for that and not for the things I could DO? I took this picture to show how Neocolour II crayons look before and after you put water on them - just a slightly wet paintbrush. It looks like wax crayon scribbles and then dissolves into intense colours - alchemy!
Friday, 6 March 2015
This began as a painted yellow background, onto which I added collage elements - for no special reason except that they rather took my fancy. I believe the posh description for this is "tuning into the vibe"? Anyway, no very deep thought went into it, just instinct. Some of the collage elements are colour copies of old journal pages, but others are images and shapes culled from magazines.
Although this, like many of my journal pages, was entirely unplanned, it always amazes me how things come together and how I later see connections that seem to be entirely "right". Maybe thats my subconscious at work .. but you can have your own theory about it!
Hope the Spring has sprung in your particular corner of the world - I'm enjoying early daffodils and crocuses, and we are quite northerly so it comes late to us here. I would like to cast off a few layers of clothing and dive right into the Spring.
Saturday, 28 February 2015
When I am short of inspiration I often make backgrounds in my journal, ready for writing on when the moment comes, and this was one of those.
As you can see below I painted the page with lime green (just ordinary craft acrylic paint) and then began to add bits of blue collage. I really LOVE blue and green together, and lime green best of all. Sadly, my family do not share my love of vivid lime green.
Saturday, 21 February 2015
So below you can see how the page originally began - with a blue paint background, over which I was gradually building a face. I'd just added some lines in the hair with a dark blue Promarker, when I decided I hated what I was doing and wanted to begin again.
I love the attitude in this woman's face, she looks proud and utterly unapologetic about who and what she is. So I wrote in the middle "I am myself", and then the rest just followed. It took me a long time to be able to make this statement (I am the child of a critical mother) and to believe that that is enough, but having got to that place I felt transformed by it and strong.
Lots of dots and other marks then followed, all done with Posca paint pens, which are opaque even over pretty dark colours. I keep thinking I will work in big bold shapes of colours without all the doodly detail, but every time ....
Anyway, the point of this page is that I AM (finally) myself, though it took a long time to dig through all the layers of expectations laid on me by others and myself. I am everything I need to be, I am comfortable in my own skin, and I have a valued place in the world. I only wish I'd got to this place earlier in my life, but now I have boy do I want to celebrate it! Go Me! :)
Friday, 13 February 2015
I love the bright colours and bold shapes I've put down here, but also the way there's no structure here, it all seems a bit random - which strongly reflected how I was feeling at a time when nothing was really making sense.
As you know I always have fun adding all the dots and doodles at the end, though on this occasion I'm wondering if I might have gone a bit over the top? Whatever, it is what is is, a glorious muddle of confusion and bright spots - a bit like my life really!
Sunday, 8 February 2015
This is one of my "talk myself out of a low mood" pages! I try really hard not to be a Moaning Minnie, always on about my pain or problems. We all know how it can feel to be on the receiving end of someone who only ever wants to talk about themselves, their health, their latest operation etc so when this journey of chronic illness began I made a private vow that I wouldn't turn into one of those. OK I will also admit that we have one in the family as a horrid example ... which made me all the more determined to work at being half full rather than half empty!
But it was a bit of a blue day so I made this background of blue circles, and you can see the first words I wrote down below. I often do this - make a background and then just write something, anything down. It frequently surprises me what pops out that I didn't know was there but which needed to be said and acknowledged in order to deal with it.
Monday, 2 February 2015
I was a bit fed up when I made this ... you might just possibly be able to tell!? Life the universe and everything was rather getting to me and I used my journal to deal with it.
So this was me making a blue/green background, because that was the mood I was in - Neocolour II crayons and a strip of collage map. When the background was dry I dripped water onto it and I really like the result that gives.
Monday, 26 January 2015
And then today, this theme felt right for another reason - today the first woman Bishop will be consecrated, which should be a day for rejoicing. However, in a week's time in our Diocese a man will also be consecrated Bishop who won't allow the Archbishop of York to lay hands upon him because those same hands will have consecrated Libby Lane. This is the idea of "taint", as in somehow poisoned by laying hands upon a woman. This man further asks that female incumbents of parishes do not celebrate communion while he is in their church. Words fail me, or at least they haven't and I have written to my Bishop protesting this appointment in the strongest terms. You can probably appreciate my point about ugliness, and I cannot understand while these two contradictory appointments seem right to the church's hierarchy?
Anyway, that's enough church politics. This page began as a painted background, with a collaged pair of shoes and some washi tapes. The shoes kind of represent the spiritual journey, and the birds on a wire the general "twittering" of many voices.