Saturday, 30 June 2018

FEAR CAN HOLD YOU BACK ...

I've been sitting in the garden a lot because we have a heatwave at the moment - an uncommon event in northern England, so I feel bound to make the most of it!  However, I have done a little bit of journal work and this is the result.

Determined to address my tendency to work in shades of a single colour, I ruthlessly painted my background in not one, but three different colours!  I know.  Had to have a sit down after that.
Now I LOVE red and black so I grabbed black and white collage elements from my neutrals drawer and just pasted away, as you can see below.  You can also see the difference between the collaged page on the right, and the one on the left with black lines and grey shadows added.  It really makes a difference when you do this.
The reference to "brave girls" is because I've been a long-time member of the Brave Girls Club - google it if that sounds like something you should be part of!  For me, it is often about challenging myself to do things which make me nervous, or will hurt ... so its been difficult when in recent weeks two different friends who don't know each other have told me off (nicely) for not getting out of the house enough.  I've had to admit to myself that part of it is a fear of going out alone - as a wheelchair user I often feel very vulnerable, and anyway why wouldn't I prefer to go out with my Beloved instead?  A corner of my brain is also asking if they might have a point ...
I'm still working on that thought and whether its something I should take action on... do I have to?  Do I need to?  Is it worth the energy?
While engaged in this ongoing process I finished the page off with my usual doodles and drawings.  I still don't know the answers to the question, but a large part of me is going "so what"?  Is it actually compulsory to leave my lovely home and studio by myself?  Now is that fear talking, or me being pragmatic and sensible ... not sure yet.

3 comments:

Cath Wilson said...

Absolutely fabulous again, Rosie... you hit on one of my 'words from God' for the year...BRAVE! The other one is KIND and I am more and more amazed at how closely linked those two actually are!

I'm sure this is nothing to do with lack of courage... more to do with confidence, which is a slightly different issue, although we both know they're related... but I'm sure you can do it if God wants you to :-)

I'm surprised you live in the North - for some reason I expected you to be in the South or at least in middle England. I'm in the North West, so am now wondering where you may be and have I unwittingly come across you on one of my spiritual adventures, lol?

Off to Google the Brave Club now :-) Great artwork, btw and I'm really impressed with the difference once you've added shade and line - I used to add shade with charcoal or grey felt tip and white for light but have stopped doing that recently. Maybe I'll start again but perhaps slightly differently this time...you've inspired me.

Enjoy the rest of the heatwave - I certainly am :-)

God bless you.

Cath x

vivici said...
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Rosie said...

Cath I'm also in the north-west, on the coast north of Liverpool. We must be soul sisters because KIND is a word with a lot of meaning for me, and something I try very hard to be. Do email me if you would like to ... the address is on the blog.