Friday, 23 December 2016


I don't often do pages specific to a season or festival - like most people I tend to be busy at such times anyway!  This however ended up being a necessary reflection and something I needed to work on.

For the first time in 37 years, none of our children will be with us at Christmas, and we aren't free to travel to them because we have to stay here for my mum in law.  I've been telling myself that its OK and I don't mind, but actually I DO, and haven't really been looking forward to Christmas at all.  Usually I'm a crazy over the top Christmas person, so feeling like this is not usual ....

I knew I needed to work it out through my journal so I began boldly, painting the page a nice festive RED.  But then in crept the sadness and all the collage I added was tones of grey.  Grey was how I was feeling.  This page shows how I don't necessarily paint to the edge because I know I'm going to cover that part.
You can see the difference below when I used a black Posca paint pen to join up the collage elements into a more unified whole.  I added the "me" figure (a Modigliani lady), and she turned out to be grey as well, not to mention looking rather sad!
So I finally began to look into my heart, and talk some sense to myself, trying to remember that Christmas will be what I CHOOSE to make it, regardless of who is, or isn't, here.

So then I jollied up the page a bit with bright holly and a Christmas tree, and its interesting to see how those colours jump off the page, and its almost like looking through a window.
What I wrote on the page was the truth of how I was feeling, that it was all a bit pointless, and having acknowledged that sadness it enabled me to gradually lay it down.  Not quickly or easily, but I made a positive choice to enjoy everything that the season offers and to give thanks for it all, however simple.

I hope your Christmas is peaceful and blessed, whether its noisy and wonderfully crazy, or quiet as ours will be.  See you in 2017, where I have this new journal to begin.


jinxxxygirl said...

Love your page Rosie.... Its okay to be sad about your Christmas not being what you want... We are the same way.. We live in the middle of the country and our children are on each coast... But hubby and i ... we are an island unto ourselves...and we find the joy in just each other.. Looking forward to seeing your pages in the New Year...Merry Christmas!Hugs! deb

Leslie Sharp said...

Your feelings are valid, and you are wise to bring them up front. You are not alone, and that's important.

It's interesting that by adding the greenery, the red looks quite orange! Must be the way it photographs on the internet.

As always, very enjoyable.

alexa said...

Oh, yes, she does look wistful ... It's years since my son and his little ones were here for Christmas and whilst I understand why they want to stay in mainland Europe at this time of year, I am always a little sad inside that I don't get to share Christmas with them (having a caring role myself here). I didn't mean to make your lovely page about my own story - just to stand beside you and let you know you are not alone ...